


Fortune Cookie Prompts

by DrellVerse



Series: Drell, Mass Effect, Among Other Sorties [6]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types
Genre: Brainstorming, Random - Freeform, Tickle the Imagination, Writing, exercise, silly fun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:09:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 1,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29609217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrellVerse/pseuds/DrellVerse
Summary: The following writing pieces are prompts from Fortune Cookie slips. I order out occasionally. To stimulate writing and play with word flow, idea conception, and erroneous promotes for unfiltered silliness, the following inane entries shall be tabulated. Warning: Some things may make no sense at all. CreateFlow method. Enjoy! It’s all Mass Effect related. Any remote similarity to real or fictitious characters has no bearing on real life or current story lines.
Series: Drell, Mass Effect, Among Other Sorties [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2009026
Kudos: 1





	1. A wise man knows everything, a shrewd one knows everyone.

**Author's Note:**

> Each prompt is written for three to five minutes before being edited for typographical fingerprints. There is no rhyme or reason. Foul language might be used, and is. Just a warning. If I consume more than one fortune cookie in one sitting, I will post as many as I remember.

Lana buckled down on the craps. She eyed the ensign across the table.

“Shoot or move,” she said.

“Move.” She passed on the die, sent it to the man in back.

“You going next?”

“Sure.” He tracked in a stare, gave it to her good. “Welcome back, Shep.”

“The fuck. . . You know who you remind me of? Tela Vasir. Only Human with a black throat. You need a kick in the head for that or you on me?”

“I’m on you.” He rolled the die. “Enjoy.”

“Motherfuck.”

“I kid you not. This is why we come around here.”

“You going to keep talking or throw another one?”

“Lady, you got my prick in a shotgun?”

“No. . . Not lately.”

They all laughed. Jane stood up, walked out, came back in with a Krogan and sat down with him in her lap.

“Who’s this?”

“Terra.”

“Is he Earth?”

“Is that supposed to be funny?”

“I don’t fucking know, but he’s kind of big. . . You mind moving him off the table?”

“Sorry, man. He just takes up a lot of space.”

“Yeah, no shit.”

“Does he talk?”

“No, but he grunts. You want to ask him something?”

“Where you from, little guy?”

The Krogan turned beady eyes towards him.

“You want a blade hilted in your skull?”

“Okay, he’s not so friendly.”

“Who is this guy?”

“He’s just some Krogan I picked up. I call him ‘Happy’. You two don’t make good friends.”

“Let me try. . . Hey, Krogy, you want to play craps? Roll the die.”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea—“

“There go the craps, and there go the die. Thanks, Ralph.”

“Okay, so it wasn’t a good idea to give the Krogan the dice.”

“Let me see that. . . Shit. Try not to be a fool?”


	2. Listen not to the vain words of empty tongue.

“Lozenges.”

“You want lozenges?”

“I want lozenges.”

Lana wanted lozenges, and she was not about to pass up an opportunity at the store to buy a bag before next leave. Omega didn’t have pharmacies. Ilium only had plague that made you blue. Nevada. . . Well, Nevada had lozenges and thresher maws now.

“Shit. Just give me the lozenges.”

“You want me to stir them in a bag with a couple cough medicine pills?”

“No. I want lozenges and maybe one of those battery packs over there for my omnitool. Would you help a lady out and hand me those?”

He stiffened and shot her a look. “You want to be careful with that stuff, dearie, I don’t think you should be messing with lozenges and battery fluid.”

“Good grief. It’s just not something I even remotely considered doing. Here. Take my chit.”

 _Damn_.

She turned away, burying her hand in her coat. _Would you ever consider moving back here?_

_Hell, no._

Lana took the back stair and went to the top of the hall. She peered left and right, moved forward, and dropped down into a crouch.

“I’m on the second level. You good?”

“Shepard, I have a visual. You keep him coming, alright?”

“You got it, Garrus.” She snapped the comm off her tool and turned to intercept the Salarian with his artificial gloves on. “Doctor Heart, I presume.”

“Who are you?” He looked startled, dropping several items from his hands. Mostly scalpels and other treasures of his that he liked to use on his victims.

Lana punched him square in the jaw.

“Shepard. . . If you knock him out, I can’t really take a redeeming shot at an unconscious Salarian.”

“That was the point, Garrus.”

The Turian made a noise of suffering. Lana smiled.

 _Shit_.


	3. It’s good time to start something new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N] Typo was per the fortune cookie. Law of permutations for Rubik’s cube 6x6 notwithstanding. Apologies to irate mathematicians who stumble on this and thumb their noses at it. I scoff for you.

“Rubik's cube. Have at.”

Legion took a hold of the small three by three block of six cubes by six cubes, multifaceted colors, and arranged it into one solid grid per side. Lana wrinkled her face and took the box back, staring first at the toy puzzle, then up at Legion leaning over her.

“No fair. Legion did the cube in less than ten milliseconds,” Tali cried from the couch in the lounge area.

“Damn,” Lana said, rotating it in her palm. “I wish I could solve this in twenty tries.”

“Fifteen.”

“Impossible.”

“Permutations were sought and corrected. Color anomaly on one side made it possible to cheat.”

Lana frowned at ‘the Legion’. “You’re not supposed to be able to do that.”

His panels flared open and unflared. Lana tossed the cube to Tali.

“Have a go at it.”

“No, Shephard, I spend too much time trying to beat Legion in chess. I need a break.”

“Creator Zorah is inferior in this respect. My systems can sustain longer durations of competition. The AI is winning.”

“Against a screw driver, you’re not,” Tali said, leaning over the side of the couch.


	4. Confucius says: show-off always shown up in show room.

“What the fuck does that mean?” Lana squared up with the administrator, Anoleis. “What do you mean, there’s no square grid?”

“There’s no way I’m taking that. Your demeanor is crude, and I don’t care for symmetry.”

“You need a reason for me to shove my foot up your ass?”

Garrus came in, tapping his Talon rifle. “We going to have a problem here? Because I can totally give you some _a_ symmetry if you really like. Now let the lady in.”

“Garrus, I really don’t need you fighting my square grids for me.”

“Trust me, it looked like you needed it. How’s those pandas doing?”

“The cuddlies? Fantastic. They ate through the bulkhead. ExoGeni knows how to screw up a species alright.”

“Don’t brag, Shepard. I seen you work over a few drell in your time.”


	5. Beauty in its various forms appeals to you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five minute prompt.

The watcher kept his eyes open, feeling for the dawn as it slipped just above the horizon. Many years had passed since he’d seen a dawn on Rakhana, and many a day he had mourned for her return to him. Maybe if there were no other desire in his heart, would he tumble so far down this path of sorrow. It was to be a new day for Casnar.

More than a lift, a breeze blew, stinging his eyes with silt and salt weather from the sea. More than once, a call from the ocean sounded above the waves and rippled shore, lying away down south for ever and ever on, it seemed. Moving across his lawn of sand and stone and pebbles marked with brilliant bright red speckles, he entered the surf and felt the cool waves lapping at his feet, then his knees, then with one big wave of his arms scooping forward from down below his hips, he surged into the water, diving, diving to who knew where?

The sea was empty, but so was his heart. Many dreams, many hopes, gone along the seabed where none other but her memory washed ashore. It came back to him, time and time again. . . His mistakes, his owances, his interminable need. . . Black hair, long, dark eyes, grey, lust beneath steel of ice and cold blade. . . He was her memory, was he not?


	6. A pleasant surprise is in store for you soon.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five minutes.

Tell me you want me, tell me you need me, tell me you desire me, tell me. . .

I will please you, restore you, fulfill you, replenish your need until all of you is empty yet again.

There will be loss, there will be sorrow, there will be. . .

Keep me with you through all your days. Let me not go, the way of the warrior. Please hold on and don’t let tomorrow bring what terrors may lay in wait.

I was built for you. I dream you. I made you through my mind. And here you stand, my masterpiece, my needs, my memories all wrapped in the palm of my hands. Look at me, breathe me, love me, love me long. . .

I am a fade. I am destiny. I am nothing but what you want. So hold me. . . Hold me close, and don’t let go.

The seasons change. The water cools. It heats again like summer. And where you wait, what memory you’re in, I am there, longing. . . Longing. . . For you. Please take my hand and walk with me a while. Savor these memories with me. Don’t let go. Don’t you _dare_ let go.

Alas, my only sorrow was that you did to me what I did to you. Surprise, dear, surprise. You welcomed me in, you let me explode, you kept me, kept me close to your bosom so that others may live. Hold me, hold me tight, this inferno that consumes both of us. No matter the cost, no matter the lives. . . Keep holding on, let it consume us.

Trickily doth the path go into our lives, each day unfold to tell us what we do not ever need to know.


	7. Remember to share good fortune as well as bad with your friends.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3:00

“Hey Garr’, what’s up?”

“Oh, nothing, Shepard. . . Just the usual.”

“. . . I see you found the hamster. . .”

“Oh. . . _That_. . . Yeah, I kind of forgot about it. . . In the clothes’ dryer.”

“How does a hamster get forgotten about in a clothes’ dryer. . . Dare I ask. . .”

“It was kind of a slip up between the socks and the furball. . . I just really couldn’t tell since they’re so small.”

“The socks are small. . . The hamster is. . . Miraculously. . . Not. So. Small. Anymore.”

“Yes. . . It appears it has inflated as a result of the detergent being mass energy generated. . . I shall have to look into this later.”


	8. Be generous, and the favor will be returned.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3:00

“Garrus. The hamster. It is _eating_ everyone. . .”

“Oh, really? I thought I heard screaming and the sound of the hard generator being spun around like a wheely ball. . . That’s what those things are called, right?”

“Garrus. The generator is about to explode. Care to help find the hamster that is _destroying_ my ship? Now? Instead of calibrating?

“Ah. . . Sure, one more tweak. . . . . There, that’s it. Sorry, Shep, I—“

“LOOK OUT!”

“There’s a hamster coming down the mess and it’s got Gardner!

“Run for your lives!”

“Where are the Collectors when you need them?!?”

“Goddamn it, Garrus! I’ll kill you! Later!”

(Runs off, taking sniper rifle with her.)

KAPOW! KAPOW!

“Squweeeee! Squweeeee!”

“Oh my God—I got it!”


End file.
